Quick Write Monday
“I’m hungry and there is nothing in the fridge,” Johnny said. ” C’mon, you’re exaggerating, there is food in the refrigerator,” said mom. “There’s some baloney, and jelly for pb and j, and bread, and some cheese.” “Are you kidding? The cheese has green on it.” ‘We will just scrape that off. It will be fine,” said mom.
Part 2 The Mall
“It is time to go home. I have had enough of the mall.” said mom. ” “We’re going home? I’m starving.” said Johnny. ” “We’ll eat at home.” You can have a grilled cheese when we get home.” “But we can eat at the food court, it will be fast.” “Are you going to pay for it?” asked mom. Dead silence.
Part 2 Carnival Ride
“You don’t look so well,” mom said. “Yeah, I’m not feeling so well,” Johnny said. “I have never felt sick on a carnival ride before. I think I know why. It’s probably from the grilled cheeses sandwich that you made me eat. Some of that green mold you scraped off made me sick.” “You are being ridiculous. Cheese is made from mold. Maybe we should go home so you can lie down. “No, maybe if I drink a bottle of water I will feel better.” “Suit yourself.”
Part 2 At the Beach
“I’m starving,” said Johnny. “Look in the cooler, help yourself.” said mom ” Are you kidding me? All we have are cheese sandwiches?” “Coming to the beach was spur of the moment. I didn’t have time to go shopping. There’s some tomato, mustard or mayonnaise. “Yuck, there’s green on the cheese.” I can’t eat this. I’m giving it to the seagull. Look, even he won’t eat the cheese.” “You’re ridiculous. I guess you’ll go hungry.”
These are a lot of fun. As a parent, I can totally relate — especially to the kids wanting to buy fast food rather than going home to eat.
The beach one felt the most natural to me in terms of the dialogue. I could hear it in my head as they went back and forth — her exhaustion, his persistence. For the second part of the exercise, you are free to add more details in terms of the actions and surroundings of the characters (sorry if that was unclear!), and if you go back to revise any of these, that’s what I would encourage you to do. I think the carnival ride could be really hillarious. As written now, since they seem so calm, I picture them on a Ferris wheel. But what if it’s actually a Tilt-A-Whirl or a loop-the-loop roller coaster? Then the juxtaposition between their calm conversation and what’s going on around them could tell us a lot about them in a really funny way.
Thank you for sharing these and congratulations on your anniversary!
Megan Blakemore ( THE WATER CASTLE and THE SPY CATCHERS OF MAPLE HILL)